Day 12: I'm a TWO time Olympian!!!
When the impossible becomes a reality
I tried so hard to sleep last night, but I’m pretty sure I got a total of 5 min because my mind was racing from the events of the day. What a whirlwind!!
How did I get here?
A year ago today, I was sitting at my desk at work, silently pondering the idea of coming back to diving and training for the Olympics. It seemed like an impossible and crazy feat to try and make the Olympics with less than a year to prepare. So many doubts and questions circled in my mind, but the calling on my heart grew too loud to ignore. Finally, I decided to take the leap of faith to train for Paris 2024 with no guarantee of actually making the Olympics. I dove head first into training, working 25-30 hours a week while training 25-30 hours a week and volunteering 6 hours a week. It was a battle, and at times, it seemed impossible, but I kept pushing, and I kept believing that I was doing the right thing and that God called me into this for a reason.
Inside my mind yesterday
I was okay with not qualifying for the Olympics in synchro because, overall, I was so proud of how Krysta and I competed together, but it put me in a high-stress position because my only other shot at the team was individual 3m. Individual events are more intense, with more competition depth, harder dives, and more opportunities to make mistakes. I knew I was capable of qualifying, but I knew it would be a battle. Coming out of the semifinals in second place gave me a little comfort going into the finals, but in diving, anything can happen, and no one is safe. The 48 hours leading up to my final were filled with emotion, restlessness, anxiety, prayer, tears, laughter, sleeplessness, and stress. My mind was racing. What if I made the team? What if I didn’t? I was grappling with myself, trying to find peace with any outcome, knowing that no matter what happened, I had grown so much on this journey.
Finally, after a wait that felt like forever, competition time came. The final was stacked with former Olympians and amazing divers who have given their hearts and souls to training. My synchro partner and Tokyo 2020 bronze medalist, Krysta Palmer, was two divers before me, and she was having the final of her life. Every time she hit the water, I would try to block out the sound of cheers and the announcer reading her scores, but it was impossible. She was putting up a fight, and I knew I didn’t have much room for error.
My first few dives were ok but not as clean as I wanted them to be, and going into the fourth round, I felt the pressure. Krysta crushed her 107b, and I knew I had to hit my dive to stay in the fight. It was a moment where I had two choices: give into the fear and give up, or let go of the fear and trust my body. I decided to let go of the fear and said, “God, let your will be done.” I walked down the board with supernatural confidence, hit the water, and when I surfaced, the crowd erupted in cheers. My coaches were screaming on the side of the pool, and I knew I had done what I needed to do.
Going into the final round, I followed Krysta. Once again, she crushed her dive. I didn’t know how many points I needed, but I knew I needed a good dive. I tried to take deep breaths as my heart was racing in my chest. Everything came down to this moment right here. I took a deep breath, and the space around me went silent; it was just me and the diving board. I walked down the board, jumped, and hit the water. Once again, the crowd erupted as I surfaced, and I saw my name flash to the top of the leaderboard. That’s it. I had just made my second Olympic team less than a year after coming out of retirement. Krysta embraced me with a hug; after all, she was the one who had called me and asked me to come back and train synchro with her for another Olympics. It was a bittersweet moment because I so earnestly wanted her to be on the Olympic team with me, but I was so thankful to have her there next to me at that moment.
I felt such a rush of adrenaline, relief, exhaustion, emotion, joy, and excitement. I thought, “What I once thought was impossible had just become possible.”
If you have read this far, I hope that my story and these words have encouraged you to take a leap of faith in your life. It is so hard to do the scary and uncertain thing, but whether it works out or not, it is such a rewarding experience to push yourself to places you never thought you could go.
So encouraging and inspiring!!